READER MAIL

Please click here to send us an email. (We do not publish email addresses.) Be sure to include your initials and hometown! -WG



The NBEM reservations hot line!

Hello! Thank you for contacting the National Bureau of Electronic Movement. Advance planning has always been the key to any safe comfortable and adventurous travel. Let us help. Listen carefully as some times and destinations may already be filled. Your trip request will be scheduled in the order in which payment is made and received.

Just enter your requested Origin and Destination travel dates when the middle finger icon appears.

Press 1) To schedule a reserved limited restroom stop en route. Passengers, pets and emotional support animals may have to delay and hold when facilities or holding tanks are at capacity. Reservations are non-transferable.

Press 2) To reserve overnight accommodations according to our time and distance travel algorithm which totally discounts for absence of any driving fatigue. Naps and other leisure behaviors are automatically deducted from the overnight accommodations time allowance.

Press 3) To schedule your pre- selected en route meal menu servings. Door Dash, Blue Apron and Grub Hub are among our vendors ready to greet you at your stops. Please, no tips, substitutions or refunds. Text any meal service complaints with food photos directly to vendors. Despite world conflict, we support Kosher, Maghreb and Mashrig entres.

Press 4) To enroll in the NBEM souvenir plan which guarantees a valuable digital memento heirloom of your trip will always await you upon return from your travel adventure.

The NBEM is your valuable ally in all land travel. See you soon!

Dr. John
Phoenix, Arizona



Awful design.

The front end of that Mercedes is the most awful thing I have ever seen on a car. It looks like the mouth of a monster I had nightmares about when I was a kid.

Ted R
Raleigh, North Carolina



Bumblers.

I am as concerned about a bunch of losers that cannot figure out how to use a crescent wrench developing "self-driving" cars as I am not being on the moon by 2024... for only $8 BILLION DOLLARS. America is being bombarded with "the future" by a bunch of idiots with no valid achievements. I remember when we went to the moon in 8 years... with no fucking computers and here we are today, still nowhere near the moon after what, 18 YEARS? Could it be because Musk and Bezos are fucking incompetent? Yeah, this isn't 1940's Germany with a bunch of technological achievements, this is a bunch of delusional idiots spewing garbage. Just like the jackass at Ford with no accomplishments and America's "auto expert", a comedian who cannot cut a section.

Ptg0
Highland Park, Michigan



Problem solved.

You don't NEED to travel anywhere. Through the magic of AI and your trusty cell phone, any and all things that should interest you can easily be brought right up to your face. You can just sit right where you are and barely need to move a muscle. See... wasn't that easy?

DJV
Wilmington, North Carolina